An Epiphany

Last week while my daughter was sick and I was trying to be well I had an epiphany.  My daughter was bemoaning how she always manages to be sick when she is about to perform.  She always does her best when she completely depends on God to help her perform.  God always comes through and she is forced to know that she is who she is through God’s strength and the talent that he has given her.  God has given her a way to know that she depends on him for everything.
Then some thoughts ran through my head.  Yes, in God’s strength I can do anything.  I am a good worker.  I am a detailed person who tries to see the overall project and make sure all the bases are being covered in a timely manner.  And then I realized that I had been prideful in that area of my life.
I was proud that my employers generally thought I walked on water.  I was prideful that I could help others achieve their goals with my work and I could make a difference.  I did not understand why everyone could not do this.  I didn’t understand until I had a job that I was incapable of doing well.  I had been prideful and I needed that revelation to understand that I had sinned.
The job that I have now I consider a gift from God.  He provided the work through no effort of my own.  He has provided employers who are gracious and willing to work around my life events.  They will even let me work from home on occasion.  They expect me to get my work done but they also expect me to keep them up to date and work on my own.
This gift from God is precious.  I know there are many bosses and managers who are not easy to please.  I know that there are environments where I do not flourish.  God has shown me and I spend every morning praising God for this job and asking his help in accomplishing my daily tasks.  How well I do in this job is only a reflection of how much I allow God to be a part of it.
I am who I am.  I have talents and I have abilities.  I received these from God and I need to remember that God is the one who blesses me daily.  I compare myself to God and I do not measure up.  I need his wisdom, his knowledge and his discernment every day.  I need his caring tender love to shine through me to others that I meet.  I need his faith and his kindness to help me be who I need to be. 
God, help me to see how marvelously you have formed others around me as well as how you formed me.  Help me to be what I was made to be and appreciate who you made them to be.  Give me the grace I need to trust you and your wisdom in how you made me.
Romans 12:3-5  In this way we are like the various parts of a human body. Each part gets its meaning from the body as a whole, not the other way around. The body we’re talking about is Christ’s body of chosen people. Each of us finds our meaning and function as a part of his body. But as a chopped-off finger or cut-off toe we wouldn’t amount to much, would we? 
So since we find ourselves fashioned into all these excellently formed and marvelously functioning parts in Christ’s body, let’s just go ahead and be what we were made to be, without enviously or pridefully comparing ourselves with each other, or trying to be something we aren’t.

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