My daughter is a high school teacher and had an interesting conversation with a mother and son today. He is an amazing kid who has goals and plans for his life. His mom wants him to do something with his summer. Which one is right? Who makes the decisions in your house?
For the son, he has passions and vision for his life. He has a plan and he is taking steps to meet those goals. Are they attainable? I don’t know, but a young high school student with passion and goals, spending seven days a week to achieve those plans? Yes, he will make something with his life.
Are you listening?
For the mom, I think she might need to sit down with her son and listen to him talk about his passion. Really listen, without judging or trying to fix him or the situation. She might be surprised.
I’m a firm believer is giving children the right and responsibility to choose. I began with small things when my son was eight years old. I let him have two dollars to go to the corner store and buy bread. He had to cross the street twice, once on the way there and once on the way back. He made it back, with bread!
As my children grew older, we decided on their education together. In junior high, we looked over the classes and choices so they could make the final choice. By the time they were in high school, they would meet with their counselor for what was required to graduate. They would explain their choices to us before we signed the form.
It was the same in their friendships. We listened and offered advice, but they made their own choices. It may have caused us concern and sent us to prayer, we still respected their opinions and feelings.
When they entered college, we weren’t concerned about them rebelling, because they were focused on their choices, decisions, and the responsibilities we had given them.
The focus wasn’t on who was in charge. We worked to enable our children become responsible adults capable of making responsible decisions in every area of their life.
What do you do to show love and respect to your children? Who makes the decisions in your house?